RuPaul: “If you can’t love yourself, how the hell you gonna love somebody else?”

RuPaul book signing

It was a last-minute decision. I heard that RuPaul was going to be in San Francisco signing for his new book “Work It: A Guide To Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Style” and after a bit of weighing the pros and cons, I realized that this is RuPaul we’re talking about here!

Ru’s positive attitude and fierce ambition has given me such comfort and inspiration in the dark times in my life. I knew that if I didn’t go see him now, I would regret it. So off I went!

Ru This way!

The book is not only full of gorgeous color photographs, but goes into details on his fashion tips and tricks, as well as a bit of his childhood and belief in love, kindness, and a positive attitude.

Now, I’m not one for appearances (those who really know me will either laugh or agree with that statement). I’m not a fashionista by far, but I do love my make-up! And my hair, good god, my hair has been my arch nemesis for as long as I can remember. But in reading “Work It!” I began to understand the concept of appearance and illusion on a different level. I began to understand it as a biological need for balance.

When we are sick, it is a symptom of our physical/emotional/spiritual selves being out of balance. Visually, our eyes/brains seek out balance as well, it is how we determine if something is pleasing or repulsive. Everyone is attracted to different aesthetics . What I find pleasing is not what others will agree with, but there is a common biological desire for balance.

The world is full of diverse beauty and when I think of the fashion or beauty industry, I immediately reject it because I feel that its goal is to play on our insecurities, have us all adopt one ideal of beauty, and profit off of that conformity and fear. After all it is an industry. But what I took from this book is that no matter who you are and what you find as beautiful and pleasing, do it and do it well.


  • “It becomes very clear that the crank calls are coming from inside the house” (on being the self-saboteur)
  • “Being true to your word is important because you don’t want to lose trust in yourself.”
  • “I understood that my talent is in being me, and nobody does me better than me” (Basically, no one does you better than you, so own it and be completely who you are)
  • “Most important, be kind. There are enough bitchy queens.”
  • “Never wear pleated pants unless your stomach is flat.” (Someone had to say it)
  • “When you put it on and it feels wrong – it is. Take it off.”
  • “They think that if you take a piece of pie, then that leave less pie for them. In truth there is unlimited pie for everyone!” (On haters.)
  • “If I was willing to change my mind, I could change the world!”
  • “Being late is never clever, cute, or cool”
  • Sinking into negativity means your ego is looking to justify a multitude of sins…”

Virgin Books

As it came closer to my turn at the signing table, I could hear Ru’s voice tumbling through the air. You could hear the smile in his voice and his laughter is contagious. He asked every person something about their make-up or what they were wearing. He greeted everyone with a beaming smile and looked right into your eyes. Of course I was so nervous I hardly said a thing. I was simply happy to have a small moment with someone I admire for their determination, positive attitude, and belief in love.

Signing away


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